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FleshFactor: Re: Techno-placa #187



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A E C  F O R U M - "F L E S H F A C T O R"
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>Can anyone tell me of a first-hand experience where a net-based
>(sexual) relationship has been successful for any length of time
>when taken out of the virtual and into the real?  I'm sure it happens, but I
>bet the disasters are a lot more common.  When is the bandwidth going to
>be high enough to transmit someone's pheromones?  Or those subtle
>physiological signs we give off when we're lying.

    --Mark Sottilaro


i know two couples who met online and have been happily married (if that's
possible) for years, but they spent a long long time getting to know each
other b4 the sex bit. i also know many couples in volatile relationships
who met in an online sexual context and wonder why they have so many
problems in the flesh. basic bar-room psychology i suppose.

Hyperreal sanitised cybersexual encounters have a narcotic effect..totally
addictive..if that's one's bent, totally immersive and totally corporeal
..but they have never crossed the terminal boundary successfully for me.

personally i see cybersex as a stage of adolescent exploration that i have
passed thu as i grow up in the virtual world. it isn't even a matter of
people lying or deliberate deception..fantasies are ideal in a controlled
rational environment like online or therapy..ideals are imperfect in a
messy fleshy random domain like daily life. online encounters tend to leak
from behind the screen leaving a nasty stain...

as an artist working with text, code, image and function, and as an observer
of cyburban culture i think it is sorta funny that the net has been written
as nature, absence, fluidity, etc awaiting culture to give it meaning -- but
when culture is presented in the forms of reproduction of real hierarchies
or the construction of 'new' space.. it is often meaningless and droll,
cluttered with junk.. ..leaving us [me anyway] still wanting something other. 


melinda rackham

melinda@subtle.net



tunnel   http://www.artoz.com/exile/tool20b/tunnel
         lust, cybersex, and crossing the boundary

line     http://www.subtle.net/line
         intimacy, privacy, and subjectivity online

home     http:www.zip.com.au/~melt


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